Christmas Vodka cake:
As people have heard that I’ve been assembling this book, I have received endless requests for me to include my Russian uncle’s Vodka Christmas Cake recipe, so here goes. Just read it – it’s a Russian classic!
You MUST read through carefully before you start to make it though, otherwise you will become SOOOOOO confooosed!
Cooking: As long as it takes.
Course: Well, as it’s called a cake, there might be a hint in the title….
Serves: Never managed to find out.
Rating: I really can’t remember
- 1…bottle Vodka
- 1 cup sugar
- 1 tsp. baking powder
- 2 cups dried fruit.
- 1 cup water
- 1 tsp. salt
- 1 cup brown sugar
- Lemon juice
- 4 large eggs
- Nuts or something
- Sample a cup of Vodka to check quality.
- Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again to be really sure it is of the highest quality then repeat.
- Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
- Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.
- At this point, it is best to make sure the Vodka is still OK. Try another cup just in case.
- Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eeggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the dry of cupped fruit.
- Pick the fruit up off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count it.
- Mix on the turner. If the fried druit getas stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
- Sample the Vodka to test for tonsisticity. Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something.
- Check the Vodka.
- Now shit….. shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table.
- Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.
- Turn the cake tin 380 degrees and try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window.
- Finish the Vodka and wipe the counter with the cat.