Red pepper & pine nut beefy-burgers


I wus quite chuffed wi’this!

Prep:          20 mins.

Cooking:      15 mins……

Course:        Lunch/supper/that sorta fing……

Serves:        2 (or 3 if you’re mean….depends on the size of the pack of mince)

Rating:         2.  Easy. You can do it…… YEAH!


  • Small pack of beef mince
  • 2 onions – I prefer red……. try blue?
  • Half of an old aubergine (optional, simply because it was there, languising in the fridge and would otherwise have been binned…..)
  • Pine nuts….. about a quarter of a packet I suppose….. WADJA MEAN HOW BIG’S A PACKET…. look on the label! (I can see I’m gonna have trouble wi’you….)
  • Half a red pepper.  I dunno how big!
  • 3 cloves of garlic (I used BIG ones….)
  • An egg.  Beaten. (Or at least defeated).
  • A small food processor.  Or a big one.  Mine’s little.  How big’s yours?  Oooooh!
  • A bowl in which you can mix’n’scrunch…..


  • You need to cut the onion, pine nuts, pepper and garlic (and I put the aubergine in there as well, as I’m a tightwad…) into chunks, so that the word….. so that the food processor can do its bit.
  • Put the mince, as broken up as possible, into the bowl.
  • Put the coarsely processed stuff into the bowl and mix with the mince .
  • Crack the egg into a cup, give it a quick beat and pour into the mince mixture.
  • Mix with a fork.
  • Get yer ‘ands in and scrunch it about for a few mins.
  • At this stage it is best to let it rest in the fridge for a couple of hours covered with cling film.
  • I didn’t, I just said that it’s best if.
  • Take big spoonfuls (or is it spoons full…..?) of the mixture and squeeeeeeeze it tight in your very clean hands, reserving the emitted fluid for the gravy/sauce in a container of some description.
  • Shape it into a thick burger/pattie shape.  You culd use one of these stainless steel cheffie rings, if you are that way inclined.  Me?  I’m a pleb.  Anyway, pop it onto an oiled plate/tray/surface/oven paper/whatever….
  • Repeat for the amount of mixture/scruncture that you have.  I want to see ‘scruncture’ in the Oxford English Dictionary……
  • Pan fry, slowly, allowing a skin/surface to form on the underside before you attempt to turn them…..cos they’ll fall apart an’ it’ll all end in tears an’ heartache otherwise.
  • Serve with a very rich beef stock (oxo), chopped tomato and blue cheese sauce.  Well, just serve with whatever you have….but it was LOVELY with a rich bee………
  • No; I’s NOT been on the beer.
  • It was lovely French pastis……

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